The End of the Tunnel

Over the last couple of months Annette and I have been struggling in our professional lives. At times, it seemed that there was no end in sight. Just as one bill was paid, another came up.

There were some people that questioned us leaving our previous jobs. Frankly, at times, I did the same thing myself. Deep down, we both knew that leaving is what God wanted. The longer we denied it, the harder it became for us to stay. I did not hate the job, it was the situation. I began to hate myself for allowing it to become as bad as it did.

We eventually took that step of faith and left. It was tough, our employers were also our friends. We did not feel as though they would understand. However, God's will was more important and He will always prevail.

So, we took that step and God has taken care of us. I would be lying if I said that I had remained stead-fast. Some days I would cry out in my heart, asking God why. Deep down, I always knew He had a reason. The problem was remembering that He had a reason and that it would be revealed to me in His time.

Then Annette got her job. This was good for us, but was hard for me. Her job was what I had been looking for. Again, I had to tell myself that God has His reasons.

The "Little Engine that could" kept chanting 'I think I can, I think I can'. Me, I had to chant in my head 'He has a reason, He has a reason'. There were days that made it almost impossible, the world had gotten to me. On those days Annette was the one saying it for me and reminding me.

Today, I was offered and accepted a job that I had been seeking. The funny thing is, I got the job through Annette's job. All the questions of why He gave her what I had wanted were answered. I just needed to remain faithful, He had a reason.

They actually offered me more money than I had been asking for. I would have taken it for less money, but they offered and it seemed rude not to turn it down. On the way home, I was going over the numbers in my head. With both our paychecks, we will be making a lot more than we were. Wow, that is God at work, there is just no other explanation.

Dancing Baby

This is my niece Alyson...

The Spirit of Saving a Buck

Now that Thanksgiving is behind us, its time for the world to go completely nuts. I'm talking about Christmas.

To be honest, I've never been crazy about it. Not that I am a Scrooge or anything, its just that people absolutely loose their minds for one month of the year. They get so busy trying to get here or there and plan for the big day, the reason for the celebration is lost. The funny thing about it is that almost everyone says that we need to "remember the reason for the season." The word 'we' includes one's self. Guess what, if you get busy planning your party or trying to buy the perfect gift that someone wants, you've probably forgot the reason. Fighting a crowd for the hot new toy for your children is not honoring God. Its not about parties and gifts, its about one gift! The gift God gave us two-thousand years ago.

I watched images on T.V. today of sale crazed people rushing into stores to get a good deal. One local station covered it live, there was a steady stream of people entering the store for seventeen full minutes. This was at five in the morning. These shoppers had started arriving at three o'clock. If you stand for two hours in freezing temperatures are you remembering?

Personally, I don't like standing in line, freezing temperatures or getting trampled to save a couple of bucks. As a rule, if I wake up before the rooster, it is for emergency purposes only.

I will admit the two things I like about Christmas are the lights and exchanging of gifts. As I sit here, I can see the neighbors lights and there is just something magical about it, no matter how big and fancy. Actually, the smaller simpler displays are better to me. Too many and it just seems over done. If you have to hire an electrician to build your display, then you probably are the same type that goes out at three a.m. to shop.

As for the gifts, I like seeing the excitement on people's faces when they open them. For myself, I would rather get something small and from the heart than a big expensive gift. I view gift giving not as getting something the person wants, but something you want them to have. Sometimes the best gift is a simple item that you never thought about for yourself, it's one that another thought you should have. That is truly giving from your heart.

So while you are out shopping and planning, think about the gift you where given by God, Jesus. This is a gift that is truly from the heart. And the best thing is, it can be re-gifted infinitely.

Thankfulness

Sometimes in life we forget to stop and really think about our situation. I am very guilty of this. Some days I get down about my situation, where I am in life and what I have not accomplished.

With Thanksgiving this Thursday, it seems like my current situation does not leave me much to be thankful. However, I have to remember that there is always something. I have married the most wonderful lady. Things are not as bad as I make them out to be. Most of all, God has His hand in my life.

I received the following today. This lady is a friend from high school. Her letter reminded me that there is always something to thank God for. The words put everything in perspective for me. She said...

"I am thankful for my sister making the decision to donate one of her kidneys to me. It was 5 years ago today that I had my kidney transplant. I am thankful that I have been able to live a full and happy life and that I continue to do so. I am thankful for my friends, family, and my husband for all their love. I am thankful to God for everything he has blessed me with.

This is the time of year that everyone should stop and take a moment to think of what they are thankful for."

Freedom of Responsibility

We have turned down the wrong street. I'm talking about freedom of speech. We have acknowledged that it is a right, but we have forgotten that it is also a responsibility. Freedom of speech does not entail saying anything you feel wherever you choose to do so.

There was once a radio talk show host here that challenged that belief by telling those who thought they had that right, to go into a crowded movie theater and yell "fire". Just see what happens then. Would it be your freedom to do that? Of course, but those actions could, and probably would, lead to injury to others. Therefore, it is a responsibility to use it wisely.

This may sound like an extreme example, but somewhere along the path we have failed to teach that there are consequences to these actions. It is our duty to use this right with an ounce of common sense. If we were to stand behind the first amendment for everything that comes out of our mouths, everyone will eventually lose the right.

Suffering and Perseverance

After I published my last post, I was reading the book of Romans. When I got to chapter five, I had to stop what I was doing and pray. Right there in the third and fourth verse was the answer to my problems.

It says "...but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character and character, hope." I have not been rejoicing in my sufferings. Therefore I have not been persevering. Which means I have not been building a Christian character or hope."

This was like a gentle rebuke to me. I had not been persevering! I had given up! The whole passage gave me a renewed vision. The entire situation that I am in is a faith and hope building experience. The words had almost jumped up at me.

That chapter had been laid on my heart earlier in the day. To be honest, I could not remember what it was about. I just knew that God wanted me to read it and I was led to it by His spirit. I had actually been studying Daniel over the few days prior to that.

It never ceases to amaze me that He knows what I need better than I do myself. If I would just listen to Him and ignore my human thinking, stop acting like spoiled child. My tendency is to keep banging my head against the wall, while He is telling me "Stop it, that won't make the wall fall down. You'll only hurt yourself." Mean while, I get a splitting headache.

So for now I will leave the tearing down of walls to God and I will just rejoice in it.

Spiritual Exhaustion

General George S. Patton once said "I don't like paying for the same real estate twice". Sometimes it seems like that is all I do. Every step forward I make, either spiritually or emotionally, it seems that something happens to push me back a step or two.

I have not posted in a couple of days because I have just been tired. Not from work, although that hasn't been helpful, but because I am emotionally and spiritually worn out. It feels like everyday there is something new on my back. Another bill, the kids need something, I have to be two places at once...and on and on...

I tend to be a negative person. There are a lot of things that are good right now. Annette is working again. Neither one of us makes that much per hour, but together we are actually not doing too bad. Its just playing catch up on everything. I suppose that is what has gotten to me.

I just keep reminding myself of what J.R.R. Tolkien said, "Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens". The road seems dark only when I fail to see the light, so I just keep going on my faith.

Compassion

This has been on my mind a lot lately. In fact, I wrote this blog last week and never published it. Then last night at church our lesson was on this very subject. Now, I may be hard headed, but I can take a hint from God. We talked about the gentle compassion of Christ towards sinners. This went right along with what I had been thinking about on the subject of protesters.

There is one group in particular, the members of Westboro Baptist Church. Jesus did not hold a sign and yell at people to win a soul, so what makes them think they will? Show them the love of Christ not the hatred of cults. Just read Mark chapter 7 or Luke chapter 7. In these passages Jesus showed gentle compassion to not only the ones being accused, but to the accusers who were as guilty.

The members of Westboro recently lost a ten million dollar lawsuit. When I heard that I almost cheered. Maybe the person that won this judgement will donate it to the Patriot Guard or a similar organization. The audacity of these people is outrageous. These brave men have died to preserve the freedom of this land and they cannot even respect a soldier's family during their grief. Do they really think this is how we change the American opinion? By making a emotionally tough time even tougher?

I don't want to be the one to break the news, but God does not rank our sin. A sin, is a sin, is a sin. The hate these people show is a sin. Do not cast the first stone. Show others the love of Christ. Hatred breeds hatred!

God's Gift to a Father Part II

Several months after my son accepted Jesus, both of my children went to church camp. They left out early Monday morning. Jeffrey was having second thoughts about going because of his shyness. Tiffany on the other hand was gung-ho about it. This was odd to me as she was not saved and was not big on going to church. Never the less she wanted to go!

They were set to come home on Friday afternoon. That morning she called to let me know where they were at and that they were going to stop for lunch. She would call when they reached the church so I could pick them up. My boss came to me and said it was slow, so when they called I could go home for the day.

I was waiting for the call when I looked up and there stood both of my children, the preacher and his wife. All four beaming. The preacher said that we needed to talk. He told me that Tiffany had accepted Jesus the night before! She had not told me over the phone because she wanted to see my face when I found out.

Tiffany wanted to be baptized the following weekend. Jeffrey had not been baptized yet because he was just too shy to go up there in front of everyone. Now, though, Tiffany was going to, so he wanted to do it also. I guess there is courage in numbers.

That Sunday was one of the most memorable of my life. Watching both of my children professing their faith to the world.

The Scales of Our Eyes

I did it again. Today at work they sent a new temp worker. He smelled like alcohol. Not like he had been drinking already, but that smell that comes out in their sweat. Being in construction I am around people that smell like that quite often.

I judged him off the bat. I never gave him a chance in my mind. Of course when you do this they will never be a good worker in your mind, no matter how hard they work. This poor guy was told to do something, he messed it up. I mumbled under my breath, something about his intelligence or lack there of.

It was at this point that I caught myself. He probably just didn't hear all the instructions, it was loud in there. Maybe he was afraid to ask for clarification, it was his first day. So, I just kept working and kicking myself. Finally I said a prayer for this guy and asked God to forgive me. After all, who knows what is going on in his life?

At lunch I went out to my truck. Recently I was given some copies of sermons from our church. I decided to listen to some of these sermons while I was sitting there. Keep in mind that I normally don't do this, usually I am talking to Annette on the phone, but she could not talk today.

In the sermon, Richard began talking about alcoholics and addicts. That is when it hit me, right between the eyes. He pointed out that all that separates a Christian from someone going through these kind of trials is the grace of God! I stopped then and there and thanked God for His grace, for keeping me out of these kind of situations.

After lunch, this person's work got much better. Not because he was working harder or better, but because the scales were off my eyes.

God's Gift to a Father

The one time in my life that God has used me to lead someone to Him was the most amazing experience. If this never happens to me again, I will die a happy man.

My church at the time was doing a witness training program. It consisted of an hour or so of classroom time and then we would go out into the community. It was actually very successful. Many people where coming to know Christ or re-dedicating themselves.

I get my kids every other weekend. We did this training on Sunday evenings, so my children were not generally around at this time. This one particular Sunday, they stayed as there was no school the next day.

The church had someone watching kids while the adults went out visiting and witnessing. The group I was with returned a little early. We were discouraged because no one on the list was home. So, I sat down outside and began to review that evenings lesson. My son saw me sitting there and came out to join me. He asked what I was reading so I told him it was how to present the gospel to people. He wanted to know how, so I began to go through that night's lesson with him.

When I was done, I looked up and saw a tear on his cheek. I asked him if he would like to accept Jesus in his life. Jeffrey is very shy, he just shook his head and said no. It was about time for the night service, so we went in.

During the invitation at the end of the service, I could see that he wanted to go up there, but he was just too shy. After the service, he looked at me and said "Dad, I think I need to go talk to the preacher, will you go with me?"

Wedding Pictures

Today

Today I will receive the greatest blessing of my life. After church Annette and I will exchange vows. No elaborate ceremony, no fancy dress, not even a cake. We wanted it that way. We wanted the focus to be on our vows to one another.

We went to get our marriage license the other day. We told the clerk that we would like this to be a covenant marriage. That is basically an agreement that we will only divorce under certain circumstances. It eliminates any 'no fault' divorce. To our dismay, we forgot to get the paper work from our pastor stating that we had been through the necessary pre-marital counseling, which is required for a covenant marriage.

"No problem" said the clerk,"I'll just fill out everything else and you can bring back the rest tomorrow." We brought it back. She had everything ready to go. All we had to do was get the agreement notarized and she happened to be a notary.

As we left with the license in hand, I read it over. I could not help but think of all the years that we had known each other. All the hardship we had been through, both separately and together. How the first story of our lives was ending and how Sunday our sequel would begin.

Struck by the Word

Lewis Grizzard is one of my favorite comedians. If you are not familiar with him, he was origially a sports writer and newspaper coloumnist. This led to books and stand-up comedy. He was a cross between Jeff Foxworthy and Jerry Clower, leaning more to Jerry. Lewis once said that his grandfather stopped going to church when he found out the preacher kept notes. Grandpa felt like God should just zap the preacher on the back of the head right before he stood up.

I suppose that Ol' Grandpa Grizzard would like my blog if he were around. Everytime I sit down in front of the computer with a blog in my head, I start typing and something completely different comes out. My last entry, for instance, I sat down to type one thing and the finished product was not what I had intended. The first pargraph or so is the same, but after that it is usually night and day.

To be completely honest, this whole post is not what I sat down to write. I had one all planned out about how wonderful Annette is and how excited I am to be marrying her this weekend. Yet other words flowed. This is proof of God working in my life.

Want further proof? I nearly flunked english in school! Not just one year, every year! I still have Annette proof read just to make sure everything looks right, but usually there is very little that needs to be changed, mainly puncutation. There would need to be more changed if it were not for that other blessing that God has sent to people like me; spell checker.

God takes our weakness and turns it into a witness for Him. Sometimes I wonder if God sits on His throne and says "Hmm...this person hates speaking I public, so I'll call him to be a preacher!" From those I have talked to, these are generally the best people, the strongest witnesses.

How much more could God do if we just got out of His way and let him work through us? Take a step back today and let Him zap you on the back of your head and do His work through you.

Roots

I was studying the book of Daniel yesterday. Chapter one to be exact. As I read about the royal official giving Daniel and his counterparts new names, I could not help but think of the old mini-series, "Roots". I kept picturing LeVar Burton tied up and some one beating him yelling "What's your name?" LeVar's character returned saying "My name is Kunta Kinte". It was at this point that he would be given the unfortunate end of a whip. Then the entire process would repeat. The slave owner was tyring to get him to change his name to Toby.

Now this example is an extreme, but the point is that he stayed true as did Daniel. Granted, Daniel was not beaten, he was however captured and an attempt was made to assimilate him into his new surroundings. Daniel asked for and was granted permission to stay true. He was even given the opportunity to prove his beliefs several times. God took Daniel's faithfulness and glorified Himself. In the process Daniel received great rewards.

How many times have we tried to fit in to our surroundings only to deny God and the opportunities that He has set before us? It's human nature to want to fit in with the crowd, to be accepted. Most of the time we are to afraid to stand up and say anything. The fear of being laughed at or scoffed is greater than the fear of God.

I must admit that I am guilty of this very offense. Many times I have been around 'the guys' and the conversation turns to something vile or sinful. Wanting to fit in I would just join right in. Most of the time these guys knew that I went to church. What kind of witness was that? I was denying my roots and my beliefs.

Lately, I have become more sensitive to these situations. I no longer participate in them. I now let it be known not that I 'go to church', but that I am a Christian. If they don't like that too bad. If they want to know more about my beliefs, I'll be over here away from that and I'll be glad to talk to you. My name is Jeff and I believe in Christ Jesus.