The Heaviest Weight

Today was tough to say the least. I am physically exhausted from trying to hold it all in. You know, the typical guy thing, be tough hold it all together, be strong. I felt like that was part of the job as pall bearer. For the most part I did. There were a few moments during the funeral that I felt my eyes welling up.

The most touching for me was when the family was viewing the baby. All the friends had left. My mother escorted my grand-mother to the front. Already there were my cousin Tammy (Madison's grand-mother) and Lindsey (Madison's mother). Slowly they all put their arms around the ones on each side of them. I noticed that it was just the four of them, four generations of ladies in a semi-circle, peering down on the fifth generation laying there.

Reality set in on me when we carried the tiny casket from the chapel to the hearse. This small weight, carried by four grown men, was the heaviest I had ever lifted, yet it was so light. As we walked, we had to take short steps because the casket was so small. Otherwise, we would have tripped over each others feet.

The walk from the hearse to the grave seemed like it lasted an hour. The family waiting there for us to deliver their loved one. It seemed very surreal.

As I have said before, there is good in the bad. The good in this was that Annette was able to meet many family members that I myself had not seen in years. Many of these were people who I looked up to as a child and who shaped my life in many ways.

Uncle Olen, who I have written about before, drove up from Texas for the funeral. As soon as he got out of the truck, he came straight over to me. We talked for about twenty minutes. Afterwards he came over and asked that Annette and I join him and some others for lunch. We were joined by my mother and step-father and by my Uncle Cliff and his wife.

Uncle Cliff and Aunt Eunice are two people I have always admired, although I never had the pleasure of spending much time with them. Both are midgets and in their eighties. They never let there height hinder them. In fact, Cliff used it to his advantage. During World War II he got a job with McDonald-Douglass, obviously unable to serve in the military. He got the job because he was small enough to fit into the tight spaces in the airplanes as they were being assembled. Realizing that he had found his niche in life, he stayed there through his entire career.

While they both are the shortest people in the family, in my eyes they are the biggest. Every time I see them, they are smiling at the big world around them and trusting God to take care of their obstacles.

Maybe I should take that lesson to heart more. When I look at this big, ugly world I should think of Cliff and Eunice taking the hand that was dealt to them and turning it to their advantage.